18/MAY/2010

‘Yeah I am a spoon and I am proud of it. I do not care if you think I should be a knife or a fork. You make me sick like a leper in a pepper factory. I would prefer it very much if you could go off like, year old out of date milk in an oven. You are so full of shit it bleeds out your eyes, so just go away’

‘What was that outrage for? I only asked if you wanted a spoon since you had some yogurt on your tray. I thought it might aid you in the consumption of it’

‘Oh, fair enough, I’m sorry. I am a spoon though, so why would I want to embrace something I’ve been trying to revolt against for the last eighteen months?’

‘That made no sense, but whatever Why get a spoon fed dessert then?’

‘You don’t have to eat it with a spoon you can drink it with a straw’

‘Would you like a straw?’

‘No thank you, sorry about that little outrage, have a nice day’

‘Thanks, you weirdo’

As Yilres walked off with her yogurt into a dark pit, unaware it was there she fell accidentally, she inevitably didn’t live due to her selfish yogurt not saving her and the speed of which she hit the ground made it impossible to live when you’re splashed out over a few hundred feet. Tuioct the yogurt survived.

Tuioct seeped through the ground rocks of the base of this dark bottomless pit. Tuioct’s sheer brute power smashed right through these rocks without mercy and made filtering through solid rock almost a straining breeze. The rocks were upset by Tuioct’s disrespect for them so the rocks sent out hit-rocks to go and eliminate Tuioct. Originally it was Yilre’s job to get rid of Tuioct but due to his disability to notice big dark holes was her weakness and died (in case you missed the first part of the story).

Moatho the ace assassinator was picked and sent down through the metrolpolis of the Earth’s core, using informants and clues come across in a pet store found Tuioct. After a twenty minute chase through little colonies of rocks and another twenty minute vehicular chase through the tiny densely populated and almost like a solidified liquid streets of the Earth’s core. When Moatho caught up with Tuioct, Moatho drank Tuioct through a straw; this is the worst possible death for yogurt.

Moatho was knighted then used for concrete in the thousand foot tall solar panels in Australia, the perfect send off.